http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=scC-jaycnEE (One More Day by Rocket Club)
I have been listening to this song a lot over the past 12 hours. I listened to it before I went to bed and again first thing this morning. It is such a powerful song to me in the fact that this is how I am feeling. It breaks my heart when I think of all the things I don't get to see her do like crawl, her first steps, hear her first words, see her first day of school, her graduation day, her wedding day. Yes it makes me cry to listen to it, but it is comforting also. I don't understand why Macie. She was such a happy little girl. She was everything to me. To me she was perfect.
I have been blessed in my life to have the parents that I do. Yes they are my parents first, but they are also my friend. Most of the time people are close to one parent or the other well I am close with both of my parents. I can call them and talk to them about anything at any time of the day. Sunday at Church the Pastor talked about planting seeds and that if you have a good relationship with your parents then they did their job in planting seeds. I couldn't help but think while he was talking that I would have done this with Macie. I always pictured having the kind of relationship with Macie that I have with my mom. An open book, no judgement, discuss anything and everything. It hurts to know that I will never get to experience this type of relationship with Macie. That she is no longer here. I also always pictured having more children and Macie having the kind of relationship her siblings that I have with my brother and Chris has with his sisters. That steal trap relationship that no one can break.
My Mom & Macie
My Dad & Macie